Dear Adi,
You were a great son, a great doctor, and a nice husband. But I wanted a friend. I tried my best, believe me I did, to find this friend in you but I failed. Right from my school days in Shimla, I dreamt of a person who could understand me. A person who would care about my feelings, and above all be my best friend. Last year when our marriage was arranged I had a strong belief that I would find this person in you.

It took me one whole year to realise that getting married to you was the biggest mistake of my life. It took me so long to realise that you only loved your wife not me. Every evening when you came back home you wanted your wife, your Jaan, by your side and without fail you always had her. You would talk about your day at the clinic, the experiences with your patients and sometimes even your stupid arguments with your colleagues. Whatever it was it did not matter, you simply had to talk. And when it was my time to talk it was just- “Jaan I'm so tired won't you give me my goodnight kiss?” When you wanted to talk I was there to listen and what about the times when I wanted to talk? When you had problems I always tried to help you and what about times when I was down and blue? When I needed you the most you were never there.

Every day I waited for my friend to come. I waited for my Aditya to come. But you came, as Adi and you wanted your Jaan. You never tried to listen to me, what Nandini felt, what Nandini wanted; it never meant anything to you. All you wanted to hear were the words “I love you too Adi”. You couldn't even understand the pretence in those words when I said it. It's true I never loved you Adi, I never could. I was so busy pretending to be your Jaan, I just couldn't think about anything. I could never have any dreams. You never let me.

Remember those “Saath Pheras”? We had promised to be husband wife for the next seven years, but now I wonder how did I even manage to spend seven months? I tried hard to find my friend in you but I failed. I think the time has come, to leave. I cannot go on. I cannot continue pretending to be someone else. I need to find myself, my dreams, and I cannot do it with you. Don't worry about me. I will not be alone. I have my dreams with me. I think I need to apologize for certain things before I leave. I am sorry for leaving you alone today, on our Anniversary, but if I stay I will again be pretending to be happy. I am sorry if you will feel miserable after I leave but I hope to be understood.

I have no option left. I have to go.
Your wife,
Nandini (Jaan)